I have always blamed Hallmark for the mixed emotions of Valentine’s Day. Their messaging told me that I needed to create or receive that perfect outing, gift, or card. I had to have that dream love affair to feel valued. Valentine’s Day can be exciting when it’s new love or it can also be painful or bring a sense of loss and loneliness, especially for those that are newly single.
Turns out that Valentine’s has much darker roots than gooshy Hallmark love. Its origins are muddled but the ancient Romans had a part in it. I won’t go into the ugly details of several stories but one included Emperor Claudius II executing two men, both named Valentine, on February 14th in different years in the third century. Their martyrdom was honored by the Catholic church with the celebration of St. Valentine’s Day. https://www.npr.org/2011/02/14/133693152/the-dark-origins-of-valentines-day
No wonder my emotions are mixed. A huge example of marketing and propaganda in history. What if Valentine’s Day and every day, we share God’s overwhelming, comforting, “agape” love? Agape love is a sacrificial love that unites and heals. It is a love of choice, not attraction or obligation. Or as John Johns, our Music Director, put it “bring love out of the merk”. It is a real chance to live out loving as God first loved us (1 John 4:19).
Before you think I am a Valentine’s Day scrooge, I am not. One of my favorite memories is when my friend and I sent our husbands on an elaborate Valentine’s scavenger hunt to find us. In contrast, this year, I found peace that it was a cost-free selfie of me and our dog with a “We love you!” sign that I sent to my family because they were scattered in various places. Love doesn’t have to be big and extravagant.
Who can we send a message that simply says, “you are loved” not on one day but always? How can we rest in the peace of not having the “perfect” way to show our love? Can we find comfort in God’s unconditional love for us if that is what we need now or pass that love on to all who need healing and care? The Holy Spirit will guide us as we make our way in all forms of love.
Learning, growing, and loving with you always,
Angie Seiller
Director of Faith Formation